Unsaid
by alwaysmarauders
Summary: She was not his to wish for. She was no one's. But his faithfulness to his best friend stopped him from even daring to wish for her.


A devilish grin spread across the face of the small boy weaving his way through wizards and witches much taller than he in Diagon Alley. The sights, the smells and the sounds all jumped out at him, embracing him in a warmth he never was able to experience at home. But this wizarding street was not his final destination. He hadn't snuck away from his mother just to experience the very same place he could see with her any old time, no matter how much more fun it was by himself. His plan was much more ambitious. You see, his parents despised all things muggle, so that was the exact thing he wanted to see.

He just about at the entrance to the Leaky Cauldron when he nearly plowed into someone outside the Apothecary.

"Bollocks," he muttered as he regained his balance. "Sorry about that."

"You shouldn't swear," replied the voice of a young girl who looked to be his age. "It's alright though. Why were you in such a hurry anyways? Or do you just enjoy nearly knocking down complete strangers?"

He stared at her for a moment, deciding whether or not he wanted to tell her. Her bright green eyes brought a grin to his face and in that moment, he not only wanted to tell her, but he wanted to impress her as well.

A proud look gleamed in his eyes as he held his head high and said, "sneaked away from my mum. I wanted to go and see the muggle street outside the Cauldron." He wondered briefly if his mom had noticed he was gone yet. If she had she probably didn't care anyways.

"-Muggle?" was surprisingly the first thing that came out of the girls mouth. He couldn't help but feel a little disheartened that he hadn't impressed her with his plan.

"Yeah, you know, non-magical people." He raised a brow and for the first time he took in the girls whole appearance. She had long wavy orange hair and a face full of freckles that was staring back at him with a look of confusion. One look at her clothes told him why. "Ohh, you're a muggle born." He knew what his mother's reaction would be if she knew he was talking to what she considered 'dirt'. He didn't think this girl was dirt though. Quite the opposite in fact, she was quite pretty.

While she still peered at him with slight incomprehension, she seemed to understand at least somewhat what he meant. "My mum's just inside there," she pointed to the door of the store next to them. "She's asking about exchanging pounds for, well, whatever wizards use."

"You've got to go to Gringotts for that. Wizard bank, just over there," he nodded his head in the direction of the great marble building. "Can't miss it." He'd heard that muggles used different money, never understood why though. Wouldn't it all be so much easier to have something everyone used?

"Thanks," the girl said. There was another moment of silence.

"I'm Sirius, by the way." He held out a hand for her to shake. He smiled at her wickedly, still slightly hoping to impress this girl who seemed so captivating to him. Perhaps it was because he knew his family would be mad at him for simply talking to her.

"Lily. Lily Evans." She reached out to take his hand but a yell from just up the Alley caused her to withdraw the hand and look with wide eyes in the direction it had come from.

"Sirius!" Walburga Black shrieked as she rushed over to her son. "Never do that again. Do you know what kind of social inquiries we'd be facing if people thought I couldn't keep an eye on my own son. Now come on, you wretched boy, we're leaving."

Her eyes fell on Lily for the first time. As the tall women took in the sight of the girls clothes a sneer formed on her face and she grabbed the wrist of her son and began to pull him along down Diagon Alley.

"What did I tell you about filth like that? They are not to be associated with! I don't want you speaking to that girl ever again."

Sirius barely managed to turn around and give Lily a meek wave as he was pulled out of site. His mind kept going back to the pretty girl he met that day, wondering if he would see her again.

* * *

"Oh- I didn't think anyone else was up."

Sirius was pulled from his thoughts by the soft voice he knew so well. For, he did see that girl from Diagon Alley again, and he never imagined he would get to know her so well over the years. Of course, it was because of James that he did. James had met Lily Evans on the Hogwarts express and had immediately become smitten with the girl. Sirius and James met shortly after that, and later on when he saw the girl again the first thing James said to him about her was that he "was going to marry her someday."

It seemed as though James had beaten Sirius to the words, for as soon as Sirius saw who his new friend was pointing out he saw that it was the very same girl he had been thinking about for half the summer. Sirius never said a word, and he watched as his soon best friend fell more and more in love with the girl as the years went by. He never let anyone know that he too had become quite taken with her. She was brilliant, and no matter how hard he looked, no girl could ever compare to her.

He glanced behind him, already knowing it was Lily who had spoken. The embers of the fireplace glowed warmly, leaving only spidery shadows across the common room. It was just light enough for him to see her face.

"James' snoring was particularly annoying tonight. And you?" He let out the slightest chuckle. His brain reeled for an excuse to get away. Of course, he could just go up to bed, but he didn't want her to think him rude. He just didn't quite like the idea of being out here alone with her. It was something he avoided. So long as he only saw her in groups, it was easier to push away the feelings he had been harbouring for six long years.

Lily snorted. "I'll make sure to use that as another excuse to why I can't go out with him." Sirius wasn't blind to the fond smile that formed on her lips, even in the dim lighting. She was starting to like him, after all these years.

"I come out here a lot actually. I like sitting out by the fire when there's no one else around." She then moved to sit in the armchair across from the one Sirius occupied.

Perfect. This would be his out. "Well in that case I'll leave you to it. Wouldn't want to ruin your alone time."

He began to lift himself out of the seat but her words halted him.

"No, stay. It'll be nice to have some company. You're not _that _bad to be around after all." Just like that, Sirius felt compelled to stay. It was funny to think that only a few years ago, she would have hated the thought of sitting in a common room alone with either he or James. Things had changed. His feelings for her, unfortunately, had not.

He lowered himself back into his seat and the two found themselves wrapped in a comfortable silence. It was Lily that broke it first. "He really likes me, doesn't he?"

Sirius felt a pang of pain in his chest. His best friend truly loved her, and he had been so loyal to him all these years that he had kept his own love for her hidden. Part of him though, no matter how hard he tried to deny it, wished that it had been him to say something about her first that day. He wished things were different. He wished he could have the chance to win her heart. He couldn't though. James… James had said something first. He didn't like to use the word 'called', not even in his thoughts, for it implied that only James could have her, that she was something that could be claimed. Essentially though, by speaking of his feelings that day on the train, it had put Sirius in a position where he had to chose between the trust and friendship of the boy who he, already, had started to feel close to, and the heart of the girl who he had met that day in Diagon Alley. He had chosen James, and a friendship that lead to brotherhood.

But still, he wished it could be him to court her. A smirk almost fell to his lips at the thought that if he had spoken of his interest first, he would have won her over by now. What, with his charms and good looks.

"He does," Sirius said quietly.

"You'd think that after all these years he would have given up by now," she sighed. That fondness was back in her eyes.

"I think… you still have no idea. The effect you can have." He said the words quietly. This was something he knew to be true. She could have anyone, and she didn't see it. Though, he knew that she had grown to care deeply for James in the last while. Someday soon he would be a very lucky man; Sirius just knew it. And just as he had promised that day on the train, he would marry her. And Sirius? Well, he would give a grand speech about how he knew it would happen eventually, and as James' best man, he would of course recount the tale of that day on the train. He would put on a face of happiness, which wouldn't be all that hard when he would see how happy they were.

"Hmm?" Again, Lily pulled him from his thoughts.

She hadn't heard him, that was good. He replaced his words with a hastily formed response, not knowing what else to say to the girl. "Don't try to delve into the mind of James. You'll just end up with a headache. He's far too unpredictable." He let out a forced chuckle.

Deciding he'd better head back to his dorm before anything else came out of his mouth, he bid her goodnight. "I'd better head back up. See you around, Evans."

Without glancing at her again, he departed the common room for what would be another sleepless night. Perhaps he'd ask Mary to spend the day with him at Hogsmeade tomorrow, to help him get his mind off the thoughts he couldn't think. It wouldn't work, but it was something he'd try again and again. It had to work eventually, right?

* * *

_Written for the Test Your Limits competition round 3 (Write a love triangle)and the Hunger Games Trilogy Competition (Mockingjay quote: I think...you still have no idea. The effect you have.), _


End file.
